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Writer's pictureErica Petersohn

Love Yourself First, and You'll Receive More Love

When you initially love yourself, you can effect lasting change. You now possess the fresh confidence, fearlessness, and conviction necessary to carry it through. You cease to rely on another person to provide you with all the emotional rewards associated with love. Once you do it, greatness will follow.


How Do You Learn To Love Yourself?

We will be happy while we love ourselves, regardless of our circumstances and what others think of us. We will be miserable when we do not love ourselves, irrespective of our events and others’ thoughts. As a result, self-love is critical. I'm going to describe how to love oneself in this blog article.


The Most Popular Self-Love Techniques Are Ineffective

Before we discuss how to love oneself specifically, I believe it is necessary to discuss why the most famous and most prevalent methods of self-love do not provide the desired outcomes.


The two most frequently heard strategies for self-love are as follows:

1) Confirmatory affirmation

2) Indulging in something physically pleasurable


Both of these strategies are acceptable. There is nothing improper with either of these actions. However, if we examine these strategies thoroughly, we can see why they cannot provide the love we need for ourselves.


If I believe I am unlovable, that belief has a cause. Suppose I repeatedly tell myself that I am lovable. In that case, it is doubtful that I would genuinely accept it because this remark does not address the underlying reason I felt I was unlovable.


How To Love Yourself: Why Doing Something Nice For Yourself Is Not Enough

We cannot love ourselves until we think negative beliefs about ourselves or our circumstances. These negative ideas are responsible for our guilt and feelings of unworthiness or inadequacy. When we reward ourselves externally (spa, vacation, dessert, etc. ), we are essentially saying, "I deserve this," "it's good that I get to experience this," and "this is something I should give myself because I am worth it." And that is perfectly OK. It presents no difficulty. These activities might be pleasurable. Continue doing it if you enjoy it.


Now that we've established why the two most frequently used methods for self-love are ineffective, let's look at how actually to experience love for oneself.


The primary question you must question yourself is "Why do I dislike myself?" or "What do I dislike about myself?" or "Why do I feel unlovable?"


We are typically so preoccupied with amusing ourselves and diverting our attention away from our thoughts that we do not let ourselves be with them. And if we are unable to identify the beliefs that are causing us to feel unlovable, we will be unable to confront them.


Because bad ideas about yourself and your life contribute to your inability to love yourself, the solution to the question "How to love yourself?" is to confront the negative thoughts. You must first eradicate the negative beliefs that make you feel unlovable to love yourself.


What Thoughts Keep You From Loving Yourself?

It may seem not very comforting to examine why you do not love yourself. However, if you do not explore these ideas, if you do not find why you do not love yourself, you will continue to feel this way and will spend your life attempting to get others to love you to help you love yourself. And this results in significant misery.


For some of us, we may struggle to love ourselves because we feel "I am ugly," "my personality is not strong enough," "I am a failure," "I am not successful enough," "I am a lousy parent," "I am not fun enough," or "I am not outgoing enough." For others, there is frequently no particular quality in ourselves that we dislike. Rather than that, an underlying sense of unworthiness or un-lovability may exist.


You can search immediately to see if you can locate your rationale. You can ask yourself any of the following: "Why don't I love myself?" "What don't I like about myself?" "Why do I feel unlovable?" or "What don't I like about my situation?"


While the answers may seem evident to you, it may be difficult to pinpoint the cause or concept behind your lack of self-love. If you cannot do so immediately, attempt to devote some time to this discovery process later. Additionally, use patience with yourself. It cannot be compelled.


Self-love: Whatever ideas make you feel unlovable or worthless, they appear unexpectedly. You did not choose these thoughts for yourself. You did not choose them. You do not influence them. If you had complete control over your thoughts, you would undoubtedly prefer to never think negatively about yourself. Thus, this is not a personal matter. As a result, you may be kind to yourself.


Closing Thoughts

Self-love is critical because we will be happy while we love ourselves, regardless of our circumstances and others' thoughts. The most popular strategies for self-love are Confirmatory Affirmation and Indulging In Something Physically Pleasurable. You must first eradicate the negative beliefs that make you feel unlovable to love yourself. It may be hard to identify the reason or concept behind your lack of self-love. As a result, you may be kind to yourself and less inclined to try to get others to love you.

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1 Comment


Adila Waqas
Adila Waqas
Apr 07, 2022

Excellent blog

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